I'm a Thieving Fructer

Note: Today’s post is going to have a little bit of Latin flavor to it, that is papal Latin, not Caribbean Latin.

Urbs in horto; A city in the garden, this is actually Chicago’s motto but it fits Portland pretty well too. And while North Portland is not known specifically for its agricultural output, at this time of the year, postal code 97217, does have a garden like aspect to it: things just grow like crazy.

And not just stuff like grass, trees and zucchini but edible things as well. Taking the dogs out for a walk is almost like stepping into a farmer’s field - except I don’t have to bleed, toil, cry and sweat in an attempt to make the garden grow nor do I have to water and weed - equally taxing but not quite as Churchillian in scope. Right now, in a three-block radius there are apples, plums and cherries free for the taking. In a few weeks there will the fruit from neglected fig trees - followed by pears, so many pears. Rosemary and mint are abundant year around – with the mint I am ever mindful to avoid the low growing leaves, funny how a boy dog can make you cautious about anything too low to the ground.

Currently, the alleys are full of blackberries, which are supposed to be an invasive species, but unlike crabgrass, they bloom and produce tasty fruit. Even the saddest vine growing out of a crack in the alley pavement yields a lots of berries – which retail in the grocery for about 4 dollars a pint. It seems odd that people would pay for blackberries – a former sweetie once cautioned me that finding men were like blackberries; if you look for in the good spots and be careful to avoid the pricks and you would never have to pay for them.

There is a word for taking the fruits off another’s property – usufruct. A compound of Usus- to use and enjoy & fructus which meant fruit in medieval Latin. The word, whose definition and spelling is helpful to know for crossword enthusiasts and a little less useful for scrabble players – but you never know when you will draw - 3 u s, a dissonant collection of consonants and have an open t on the board. Although there is slightly different legal usage, the word means the right to enjoy the fruits of another’s property or labor. And depending on your source, the word is as ancient as either Roman Law or English common law. If you believe the Roman law etymology, the concept evolved to legally sanction which party gained the profits realized from slave labor (Hint: It wasn’t the slave). Its use in English common law helped settle who gained the proceeds from the working abandoned lands.

Here in modern times, in my North Portland neighborhood, I use to word justify taking fruit from alleyways and easements rather than have it rot and go to waste. I am a badass usufructer and I don’t mind you saying so.

Friend of Saucyman; Charlie Seluzicki will be posting early next week as I am on assignment…I am spending the weekend attempting to be the first man ever to complete reading Elizabeth Gilbert’s Eat, Pray, Love. Don’t worry, I think I will okay. If all goes well, I will file the first XY book report towards the middle of next week.